My Words

There are days when I feel feelings I can not understand, or simply choose not to… things I feel and think which cause me to doubt and hide within the words I create… there are times when I am so tired I wish the world would slow so I could catch up… there are moments in which I feel the weight and fall to my knees…

I write these words with no purpose…

I look not for reason, for reason has led me to hide within these words, hide within my mind…

Tears can not flow tonight… the well is empty, yet shallow enough to be full

I sit now and wait… for the words I create to bring a filling breath to my lungs…


the breath I long for. the breath I need

Life

i believe in love & lust & sex & romance

i don't want everything to add up to some perfect equation

i want mess and chaos

i want someone to go crazy out of their mind for me

i want to feel passion & heat & sweat & madness

i want it all.

 

life isn't always easy, it's full of tough decisions and heartache,

and things don't always work out the way we hoped.

life just doesn't come with guarantees. and while it's true that sometimes,

by avoiding taking a chance on people, we can avoid some heartache,

we might also miss out on the best times of our life. don't be afraid to love.

 

Life is like a roller coaster; you get jerked one way and another, and you never know whats around the corner, but you just got to enjoy the ride!

Nobody said that it'd be easy they just promised it'd be worth it.

 life is what you make it

so let's make it rock

Layers

“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.”


Anais Nin

I have always been fascinated with layers. Full skirts of secrets, delicate fabrics piled up like soft snow over each other, a soft movement over the skin.

Layers should not come with weight, there should always be plenty of pockets of air, spaces where to hide and discover, a lightness that frees instead of imposing.

That is my type of skirt-the one I want my mind dressed of, with plenty of room for the cells, a nest to my constellations...

It Is A Quiet Day

There is a calm on a winter morning, a quiet before the now begins to fall. The gray sky is dark and yet light at the same time, the clouds filled with the soft white flakes that will soon drift over the landscape. Snow has always had a sound of its own. When I was a child I always knew when the snow arrived in the night, the usual stillness replaced by something I still find hard to explain.


This year I am savoring the season, delighting in the lights others have put outside, listening to good music and taking in an energy that seems to surround me. That energy fills me and reminds me to listen only to myself and to what I feel deep within. My words flow this morning but there are too many and so they collide in their efforts to be heard. I think today I will sit with them, jotting them down here and there and then perhaps I will be able to organize them enough to put some of them here. It will be a quiet day for such things, the gentle quiet of snow, the whisper of the earth as it drifts to sleep under a blanket of white.

Random Notes.....

1. Some people will stand in insanely long lines, for hours, to buy sale clothes - but I just can't do it..i dont have the power.


2. Turning off all your lights in favour of candles is something everyone should do often

3. After I get a French manicure I look at my hands alot and find reasons to get people to notice my nails *grins*.

4. Getting roses will always make me feel giddy.

5. Chocolate truffles are always better with an alcohol filling

6. Afternoon naps can do wonders for your mood.

7. Window shopping could be used as a form of torture

8. Homemade bread is so delicious

9. Brilliant music really helps fuel my imagination

10. A one minute kiss can burn 26 calories (apparently)

The quiet talk drifts

Tonight I was thinking of the quiet way talk through such small things, words spoken between words, letters and poetry drifting through time and space. A simple letter but so powerful finding the way across oceans, carrying so much, written with few words. But I have heard you from the first day I found you, between the words and beyond the page. Where have you been? I have missed the sound of your voice.

The Wonder of December

Magic dwells within every month, from the ruby red of a February heart to the chromium yellow of a sunrise in August. It drifts like wandlight over the gardens of June and flies along with October leaves. But every month holds something back, keeps a petal of unique enchantment in quiet reserve, for each one desires to contribute just a bit of themselves to the most magical month in the circle, and now that time has come. They have gathered together in celestial towers to bestow their gifts upon December. The cool mystery of an April dawn, the bronze glow of an afternoon in November, the stretched-long hours of a carefree July, the playful winds of March that dance amongst the trees - all can be found here. For we have arrived at the zenith of the visionary year, the very place where all the delights of each and every month now gather as one.

Yes, this is the month of true wizardry, when the hillsides dress in silver and fairies wear feathers and sleep in bare trees. Chimerical worlds are sheathed inside a single drop of ice, and an auroral star glitters high in the eastern sky.

The animals speak at midnight.

Goodwill cracks the hardest soul.

All of the wonder of the long wondrous year can be found in the month of December. It fills us up, floods through our spirits until every room is full and we must share our felicity with others. We give gifts, we share smiles, we ring bells. We are beguiled by the blessed beauty of life.

It is all astonishing goodness in thirty one days.

It is now December.



Huzzah!

Monday Madness

I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry, because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?”

Unforgettable

And what about all the lovely books to read...when its cold outside..sitting comfy and snug...listening to the wind and rain..or just the silence of the snow surrounding your home.. Wander through the moors together with Cathy..surching for Heathcliff..(Wuthering heights)Smile ,when Scrooge buys the biggest turkey in town(A Christmas Carol)Cuddle up warmly in your blancket when The Snow Queen changes the hearth of Kay into Ice(Andersen Fairytale)..Get the tissues out to dry your tears when Charlotte dies..(Charlottes web)or when Snowwhite gets lost in the forest.(Grimm Fairytale))...Know ..these are "the best of times,and the worst of times"(Tale of two cities)..its been that way for ages so better make the moment magical and the times unforgettable..

Talk to Me

Talk to me

say the things you would say

If I wasn't here

that you didn't say

to her.

In the wild wet waste

Of a Whitby shore

under freezing stars;

Sit with me

and roll your words out

over the salt sea.

Talk to me

Of the girl in blue

and answer all the questions

All the questions I have ever asked

of you.

Talk to me

say the things you would say

If I wasn't here

That you didn't say

to her.

no place like home

“Close you eyes and tap your heels together three times. And think to yourself, there's no place like home.




Ease on down now...Its a brand new day

Step out into the world

"Step out into the world." She said, She said, "Step out into the world." She said. The miracle is in the air, just down the stairs, the miracle of living is there.

You scatter your footsteps and raise up the crickets, you crunch the frost beneath your slippers. "Step out into the world." she said, she said, "Step out into the world." She said. For what could be better than to slip out of the fetters of forgetting the world outside our door.

Sometimes she thinks about running away. Then she remembers summer sunrises seen from the top of the gorge, and she stays right where she is. Where on this good green earth could she go and have such coinage to tuck in the pockets of her old photographer's vest?


It is October, and she is far from her lofty granite perch, but she is there in her thoughts. She sits with her legs dangling over the edge and watches the clouds drift by - sometimes she feels like a cloud herself.

Books

I have always imagined paradise to be a kind of library.

Jorge Luis Borges

(1899-1986)

I'm with Borges on this.


I think it's fair to say that I couldn't (or don't want to) imagine my life without books. Reading is like air to me. Or friends and family. Or, at the very least, like clothing. I suppose if we want to be literal, clothes might be something I could manage without - 'specially if I lived on a warm, desert island or in a house with underfloor heating... but really, how practical or pleasant or indeed, possible, would it be to try to lead the life I love, without clothes? Not very. Same with books. I feel I need them like I need shelter and clothing and chocolate.

I know I'm not alone in this and I love that there are people out there (and lots and lots of them apparently inhabit this lovely blogosphere) who get it. Truly get it.

I read every day, no matter how briefly, and luxury equates to hours and hours of uninterrupted reading time. I can never have too much time for reading. I know that for many Summer's when they especially indulge their love of reading but for me, it's when the days draw in and the chill increasingly invites me to snuggle up under a blanket with a warm spicy chai and a selection of snacks, that I start to get excited about spending more time with a book in hand.

Something I know some people find weird about my reading habits (and even infuriating if they have to share a space with me and my multiple piles of bookmarked books) is that I find it impossible to read only one book at a time (yes, yes, trouble narrowing things down... it's a recurring theme. Deeply ingrained, this need for variety, even here). In general, I'll have at least one novel, a non-fiction read, several dip-in-and-out-ables (creative books usually fall into this category for me) and a few magazines... all on the go at the same time.


The thing about reading like this is that I'm constantly looking for new things to add to the pile. New inspiration. And much as I love them, I do sometimes find bookshops a little overwhelming - so many books, never enough time to read (or even browse) them all. So I like reading what others have recommended. Whether they be reviewers I've come to trust, friends, family, or kindred spirits briefly encountered, I love to hear what other people are reading and enjoying. This way I'm often introduced to new authors or individual gems that I might not have discovered otherwise.